Love your neighbor as yourself. Do to others as you would have them do to you. Pray for those who persecute you. Love your enemies.

We hear Jesus say all of these things, and a lot of times we quote, “Love your enemies,” or “Pray for your enemies,” without actually thinking about what this phrase might mean.

More often than not, we do pray for our enemies, but we pray for them saying, “God, help them find You so that they stop hurting me.”

Or maybe, “Lord, help them with their attitude—they need it, trust me.”

Or the easiest one to pray: “Father, take them out of my life. They make me miserable.”

But how often do we pray, “God, give them peace?”

We don’t, right? And I’m sure there’s many reasons why, but the biggest one I came down to was this:

They are the reason I don’t have peace—so why should I be the reason they do have peace?

Prayer is a powerful thing, it’s not something we should take lightly. And when we keep that in mind, we should know that our prayer changes lives. And when we keep that in mind, we should know that our prayer for others’ peace of mind can change their lives.

Including our enemies’ lives.

More often than not, I’ll ask a friend, “Hey, can you pray for this person? They’re just really hurting and it’s causing them to hurt me. But I want them to have peace.”

Yeah, sure I want them to have peace…but that’s beneficial for me too.

And then—the nail in the coffin to this not-so-selfless request—I’ll let my friend be the one praying for this person when I myself am left smoking in the ears at the thought of them and their deeds.

So much for praying for my enemies, right?

And when we get in this mindset of, “I’ll ask for prayer to seem like I’m good and holy,” that’s when it starts to get really dangerous.

Now let’s talk about what praying for our enemies can mean.

More often than not, we need to pray this: “God, help them. I don’t know what they’re going through, but I pray that you help them and give them guidance and show them Your love.”

We shouldn’t be praying, “God, show them they’re wrong and make them feel bad for everything they’ve done to me, and make them apologize for their actions so that I can be healed.”

That’s not part of the healing process. Healing is not asking for vengeance. It’s asking for healing.

The healing process is a two-way lane—pray for them and pray for yourself.

It might look like this: “God, I pray over the situation between me and this person. We’re both hurting in different ways, but I know that one thing is true: we need Your peace and healing. I ask that You not only encounter them in a way that rocks their world, but encounter me in a way that changes the way I look at them. I want to look at them with love and a godly POV, and I can’t do that by myself.”

When we look at the verses Matthew 5:43-48, we so often forget the things that Jesus says just moments before.

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”
Matthew 5:3-12 NIV

And when we read the beatitudes, we see that whomever is poor in spirit, mourning, meek, hungry and thirsty for righteousness, merciful, pure in heart, the peacemakers, and the persecuted—they are all blessed beyond measure in some way, shape, or form.

But I want to focus on are the pure in heart, peacemakers, and the persecuted.

When you pray with the right heart posture, you have a pure heart. And by having a pure heart, you will become a peacemaker and a peacekeeper. But because of those two things (and all the other aforementioned qualities) you will be persecuted.

It’s important to connect verses 3-12 to 43-48 because praying for our enemies—for them, not simply about them—is the mark of a peacemaker. Not many people pray for their enemies’ struggles.

And I know that a lot of times we might not have people who are our outright enemies. Maybe it’s someone you disagree with or had a falling out with, or even someone who hurt you hasn’t apologized.

But if you’re angry at them—even if it’s a righteous anger—you are still called to pray for them. It’s one thing to be angry at them for something they’ve done wrong and another thing to hold a grudge for something they did years ago.

I struggle with this. Praying for my enemies is hard, and sometimes it’s even harder when it’s not an outright enemy but rather someone who just…left. Or maybe not left, but we had a falling out and stuff happened. And it is so much harder with that person because we had a relationship or the intimacy of a friendship that only friends can have. So when they break that trust, it breaks you.

Being called to pray for and love our enemies does not disqualify your hurt.

Friend, I know it hurts. I’ve been there—the relational loss of a friend or a loved one is a horrible feeling. It’s even worse when someone tells you, “Just pray, it will get better.” Because while prayer and communication with God does make things better, it’s still a healing process and journey that cannot be rushed.

Don’t rush your healing process. That in itself is unhealthy and contradicts the exact thing which you are trying to do.

But it’s not something you can do alone either. Seek out a mentor of some sort who will not only listen to your thoughts but also guide you in the healing process. But people who push away your pain and also shove it away are not healthy people to be around at this moment, at least not when discussing your hurt.

Praying for our enemies is hard—but it is needed.

The healing process is hard—but it is coming.

The Lord is always kind—even when it is hard.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you have a great day!
~Willow